Music Tolerance?

I consider myself open-minded and not judgmental, but that happens to me all the time:

I’m at a party and I’m talking to someone, we get along, then a song is being played, that he/she doesn’t like and it goes like that:

He/She: “OMG, that crap again, I can’t understand how some people can call that music.”

Me: “Well, it may not be your kind of music, but it’s still music.”

He/She: “Yeah, music for stupid/teenage/drunk/simple/crappy […] people.”

Me: “You can’t say that someone is stupid, because he listens to a certain kind of music. I like that song, am I stupid?”

He/She: “No, but most people who listen to that kind of crap are stupid.”

…and that goes for a while.

The “problem” is that I’m thinking to myself: “Another judgmental, closed-minded little person, who’s trying to be smart by listening to some kind of “smart” music and simplify his world by seeing only the fans of that music as worthy. O, wait a minute, by thinking that you’re doing the same thing, only that instead of the fans of some music, you see only the (music) tolerant people as worthy.”

So what now? Should I tolerate people’s intolerance?

I don’t think so, I think it’s not right and stupid. But these people think the same way about other people liking certain kinds of music, so if I have the right not to tolerate people intolerance because it’s stupid, they do also have the right to be intolerant.

So it’s alright I guess?

Well yeah, but not really. Recently a friend of mine was telling me about her time in Bulgaria and she said something like: “I’m having a lot of fun, at “chalga”-places* too. Not that I’m that type of person, o f…, I’ll just say it- I listen to chalga.”

I really can’t imagine what kind of reaction she was expecting, kind of: “OMG, are you serious? Clearly we can’t be friends anymore, because you listen to that music and that’s so under my level, I can’t believe I let you fool me you’re a decent person.” WTF?

So it’s not quite alright to be music intolerant, because it leads to people being ashamed of something they like or listening to something they don’t like, but it’s considered smart.

And I would like not to be looked at totally different depending on if I’m in a Jazz-, Harem-, Hard-, House-, Hip-Hop-, Tip-Hop-, Chill-, or many other Moods.

*chalga is a music genre, considered  as music for “stupid”, simple-minded people froma  lot of Bulgarians

PS. I hope you know that listening to  Mozart will not make your baby smart, the best prediction for the intellect of your baby is YOUR intellect, so trying to be the most intelligent you’re capable of is the best for you AND your baby!


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5 Responses to “Music Tolerance?”

  1. helen Says:

    I used to know somebody who listened to chalga AND Mozart. He turned out to be a horrible person in the end.
    Another thought – “A Clockwork Orange” – the main character there listens to Beethoven at home.
    Yet, another thought – do you remember your tweet about how tastes tell a lot about you? 🙂

    • teo Says:

      I rember 🙂 And as I’ve said there, I think that the “taste hunter” describes my “taste”-history the best.

      Tastes are just the top of the pyramid, a lot of things tells a lot about a person (looks, facial features, voice, walk, gesture, etc.). Still, that doesn’t mean, that you can judge him based only on one of those things, e.g. taste. Correlation is not causation. I should really try to continue a research on that topic…

      Anyway, my point was not about what a taste says about you, but if your tolerance or intolerance of tastes influences others, if you can call yourself tolerant, while not tolerating intolerance?

      btw, Hannibal Lecter wasn’t listening to Britney Spears while dinning delicious human parts either… FYI: I listen to chalga AND Mozart too 😉

      I remember one of the few presents I was begging my parents for- a Johann Strauss Jr. cassette, I was 4 or 5 at the time. I didn’t really realized “what kind of music” that was, I just liked it so much.

      I just wish that we could all be as free in our tastes as a child unaware of social norms, preferences, prejudices etc. and most of the time I don’t get the feeling that we are or that we let others be.

      • helen Says:

        Well and my point was that I had been tolerant to other people’s tastes and cookiness and sometimes I just shouldn’t have done it because it turned out bad for me in the end. After all, the tastes tell a lot about the person’s character. On the other hand, one of my best friends listens to chalga and she has never turned me down until now.
        I enjoy Beethoven myself. I am not much into Mozart 🙂

  2. helen Says:

    General point – not to make the previous comment rather too long.
    Tolerance means that you accept the fact that other people may have different tastes. In addition it means that you accept the fact that they and even you may be judgemental from time to time. Also, you try not to be judgemental and more tolerant so that you don’t miss a lot of wonderful opportunities just because you rush to judge people on the basis of stupid things like race, sex, taste in clothes, status symbols, hair-dos and vocabulary.
    However, you should have your healthy boundaries and keep them too.

    • teo Says:

      Exactly what I mean- it seems like every tolerance or “not judgmentalness” has limits, a few exceptions to support the rule I guess 🙂 And too much of them is not good in neither direction.
      The only steady correlation between tastes in music and people that I’ve noticed till now is, that metal-fans are the least music-tolerant, but otherwise open to new ideas.

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