My Dream(s)?

So, so – Nezzo wants to know what I dream about/what’s my dream?

That’s kind of a weird coincidence, because while I was in Bulgaria, having dinner with my parents and some friends we were talking about a similar topic. As you know I’ve got my BSc this year and my mother said something like “The first step to achieving her dream is done, remember how we never took her seriously when she began talking about becoming a psychologist and how we didn’t want her to study it?” (I knew I want to be a psychologist since I was 11, at that time my parents didn’t knew anything about it and thought that it’s not a prospective profession).

That got me thinking – is that still my dream? Like dream dream? It seems just so trivial now, I even had doubts about it as my dream profession, now I feel it more like – “ok, that’s what I want to be in professional aspect”, but my dream???

A dream for me is the idea of what would make you happy, satisfied, a direction you go towards to. Being very poor and with the not-really-money-bringing reputation of the psychologist profession in Bulgaria I can see how at the age of 11 it looked like the ultimate personal achievement for me to become a successful psychologist on my own (everyone being against it only made my will and wish stronger of course). Now I’m really one step closer to it, so I can see that although it’s important for me to achieve that “childhood dream” it’s way not enough to make me happy and give me direction.

One friend we were having dinner with that night always supported my wish to become a psychologist back then. After my mother said that about me being closer to achieving my dream, that friend said how she still regrets it that her parents managed to push her into studying medicine, while she really wanted to study pharmacy. Although she’s a very successful medic now and has a beautiful family, obviously that little thing disturbs her happiness a little bit and probably that’s the reason she supported me and stood up for me back then.

So why am I telling you this? Being a psychologist is not my dream, it wouldn’t make me happy, although I need it in order to be happy, it’s the necessary, but not sufficient condition for my happiness. Also a necessary and almost (!) sufficient condition is having a happy little (or may be a big one too) family. But even now I can see and feel how something still would be missing.

For that we have to go a couple of years back to my earlier “childhood dream” – to become a president in order to make things better. So what I really dream about is change, change to the better (may be that’s why I need to change jobs and addresses at least once every year, if I had enough money I would also change countries, but I’m not there yet)

I don’t find my childhood dream irrational or unachievable, being a president was simply the only imaginable position for me at that time, that would allow me to make a difference. The pure idea of child-me was to become something, that could make things better and that hasn’t changed a bit!

(I want change, but in a not rebellious way, not rebellious in the way most people see it, but in president and not Robin Hood way. I simply believe that in order to destroy the system, you have to be an important part of it and destroy it from the inside)

So, my dear readers – what do you dream about/what is your dream?

(I’ll not tag single persons, I really would like to know that from everyone who’s willing to share)

Tags: , , , , , ,

8 Responses to “My Dream(s)?”

  1. Nezzo Says:

    Интересна гледна точка над нещата, президент или психолог. Хммм, не е задължително да си на висока позиция, за да променяш нещата. Но, за да промениш нещо друго, първо трябва да промениш себе си 🙂
    Interesting point of view, president or psychologist. Hm, it’s not necessary to have a high position in society in order to change things. But in order to change somethings else, first you have to change yourself 🙂

    • teo Says:

      Не е президент или психолог, а президент и психолог. За да сме по-точни психолог, който ще промени (подобри) нещо някога за някого.

      Не казвам, че е задължително, а просто, че това е моят начин. Променям се непрекъснато, но от друга страна съм си пак същата – когато шлифоваш замърсяванията не променяш сърцето 🙂

      It’s not president or psychologist, but president and psychologist, to be more specific a psychologist who makes a difference someday for someone.

      I don’t say if it’s necessary or not, but just that that’s my way 🙂 I change myself all the time, I’m under construction, but I’m also still the same – by clearing up the unclarities you don’t change the heart 😉

  2. helen Says:

    Dream is what you do at night 🙂

    Seriously, my dream, my wish is the same – change for the better. But my means are different – I don’t want to have the “authority” to change things. Because when you are once part of the system, the system will crash you. People need to be changed from within and then they would create new systems.

    • teo Says:

      I just think that the system doesn’t necessary crash you, or at least I’m still convinced that it wouldn’t crash me, although I’m aware of the risk and I take it.

      I really believe that we need authority in order to change things in general, to make things better even for the people, who doesn’t care about the system or who are too hungry to think about the system, these people need authority that strives for improving their lives. You say it too – people will create new system, new system would be an authority too…

      And anyway – if we all work for change, the way we do it doesn’t matter 😉

  3. godlesspaladin Says:

    My dream? Well that’s a really big question for me right now. Like you, I just got my degree, but in my last year of university my dream completely changed.

    Growing up I wanted to be a film maker. My best friend and I had a small studio, we bought equipment, and made movies. It was great, but then we fell apart and stopped talking. I had spent almost every day for 8 years with him, and so the thought of making movies left a bad taste in my mouth. 😦

    I changed my dream to becoming an archaeologist. I loved history and wanted to find things in the ground that would help me better understand how people lived. I went to university for history and while I was there I worked as an intern for real archaeologists. I helped them dig and sort artifacts. I took summer courses with them and even flew to the UK to spend a month taking more courses.

    A few months before I graduated, I decided that my heart was not in it. Perhaps it was depression, since I also stopped loving a hobby I had for 10+ years. So now I have a degree and training for something very narrow that I don’t want to do. >.< I've been trying to find a new dream, a new passion for months, but it's really difficult.

    I have some ideas though. I know I want to make a difference, like you. I want to help people and change things. There is a channel on youtube "TED talks", there they have all sorts of people who are making a difference give lectures on what they are doing. They have everything from university professors who are bringing computers to villages in India, to scientists fighting malaria, to even past presidents and prime ministers, go check it out ^_^) I would like to do something important enough that I one day can give a lecture on how I'm helping people on that channel. (But what exactly I will do, I'm not sure.)

    • teo Says:

      That’s really nice and I wish you best luck with it! Thanks for sharing your story, interesting… I can imagine how difficult it is to find out that your degree isn’t really in a subject you want to spend your life working in…

      I’m a TED-fan too, glad that you like it. I’ll be even more glad to see some familiar faces there someday 😉

  4. The Lazy Photographer Says:

    I don’t think I ever had a dream, really. I sort of fell into a profession and made it work for me until I got sooo sick of it I had to get out. That was about five years ago. Since then the only that makes me happy to some extent is photography. And like the saying goes, find a job that makes you happy and you’ll never have to work a day in your life. I judge such things this way: If what you are doing makes you miss meals and stay up long past your bedtime, then you’re probably really enjoying the work — even if it’s only a hobby. If it is a hobby, it might make sense to explore ways to monetize it. As for my personal life, I haven’t found happiness yet, but since I gave up trying to find it, I find myself a bit happier. The secret, my secret, is to learn to live with being alone and to accept the cards you’ve been dealt in life, but at the same time to not take for granted the things you do have in your life. Another saying I like is this: Wealth is defined not by how much you have but by how little you need. So there you have it.

    • teo Says:

      I’m glad that you feel that way and I hope that someday you’ll find something that makes you even happier than that or than photography. And as for photography – you’re really great in it, so good professional choice 🙂 Not concentrating on the search for happiness is definitely the better way to spend the time now, so that you can enjoy it even before the wow-effect.

      I like the sayings above too, but I like this one more: “It is not true that people stop pursuing dreams because they grow old, they grow old because they stop pursuing dreams.” 😉

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: